Grandparents. Sometimes really great, but other times, I would like to kick 'em a little...

As most of you who follow the facebook page know, my oldest son got into trouble (and grounded) AGAIN, for the same thing. Refusing to check in with me. This is not hard, and by his own admission, this is his third offense. Actually, he had the stones to say to me, during his fourth debate on the grounding issue, "The first two times, I was just being a kid and a jerk, but this last time was an accident, so you shouldn't ground me!" Wait, what? Did you just hear the shit that came out of your mouth? Three times, really? I thought it was two, to be honest. Anywho, no need to re-hash that story, but what happened next, truly baffles me. I am an only child, and am extremely close to my Mom. We are more like friends now that we are older. She is 63 and I am 41. She has always been somewhat of a rebel, and then later a hippie child. My parents divorced when I was very little and frankly, I don't even remember them being married! My Mom remarried an older, conservative fellow, whom I adored, when I was four. He was very strict as a parent and rightly so. When they got married, he told my Mom that he would be taking over the discipline of me- I was kind of allowed to run wild LOL- and that she could disagree, just not in front of me. Mixed signals and all that, and he firmly believed that consistency is key. She agreed, with the stipulation that I was never to be spanked. Well, as luck would have it for them, I was a pretty good kid. Teenager, too. I always respected and even feared my parents wrath and/or disappointment. When I was a young teen, my Mom could seriously be hell on wheels, in the old anger department. I did not talk to her in certain ways, or she may slap my face. It only happened once, but I sure as hell remember it. She just had to get that look, and I knew there was a line about to be crossed. RETREAT!!! So, she calls me last night to ask how things are going with my son. I tell her the truth and she comes unglued, accusing me of power plays, being a dictator and favoritism toward my younger son, then proceeds with telling me that I am being unreasonable, mean and blah, blah, blah... WHAT???!!!  Who in the hell are you, and what have you done with the hard ass mother that raised ME? We ended up shouting and me telling her to shut up, that I was sick of her shit with spoiling my oldest and to let me be a parent in peace! When did grandparents lose their spine and their minds, I would like to know? We have worked it out, but it's just nuts to me. We would NEVER have gotten away with the crap our parents tell us to "lighten up" on. Are you kidding me? Give me a big fat break, please. *eye roll* XO ~Heather